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Happy Birthday Aja!
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Aja
Pajamazon


Joined: 21 Jul 2002
Posts: 2081
Location: Thataway

PostPosted: Thu Jan 16, 2014 11:33 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Yay, thanks! You guys are the best. Music

*picks up a martini glass of diet ginger ale, garnished with an olive on a stick*

young wrote:
Alas, Brady ate all the cake.

Then it must have been a mighty fine cake.

Shadowstorm wrote:
Of course, if you're ok with your cake potentially being a Soviet Russia-style confectionery, I guess I could bake one up. You'll need to sign this waiver, though.

Well, if you put it that way... Shocked

*hastily signs waiver*

...Who could resist? Nudge Nudge

*passes around some birthday pizza to tide everyone over*
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Shadowstorm
Noble


Joined: 21 Sep 2003
Posts: 145
Location: The place you would least expect.

PostPosted: Fri Jan 17, 2014 1:10 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

**Takes the legally binding document and skims it over**

Uh huh....initialed there....signed there, there and there...next of kin filled in....ok! Looks like everything here is in order.

**Stows the legal waiver away carefully**

Now let's bake you that cake!

**Dons a chef's hat and a cooking apron....lined with mythril**

Right, then. Ingredients...check. Oven....check. Cake suppression team....check.

Now, let me just consult the new cookbook...

Step 1: Preheat oven. Simple enough.

Step 2: Mix ingredients thoroughly in large bowl. Ok, not difficult...

**Gathers the flour, sugar, and other such essentials and mixes it all into a fine batter**

Step 3: Pour batter into pan and bake for 20 to 30 minutes. No problem!

**Pours the finished batter into a greased pan and places it in the preheated oven**

There! That wasn't hard at all! Honestly, you guys, with this being as easy as it is, you all could have baked Miss Aja a...wait. 'Recipe continued on next page'...?

Step 4: WARNING!!! During step 2, ingredients MUST be stirred in clockwise direction ONLY!

ACHTUNG!!! Failure to follow these instructions will result in [splatters of blood obscure the rest of the page]

I....but....who would write a recipe like this?! Anyways, I'm....pretty sure I mixed it in the right direction?
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Aja
Pajamazon


Joined: 21 Jul 2002
Posts: 2081
Location: Thataway

PostPosted: Fri Jan 17, 2014 11:40 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

*peers into the kitchen*

Ooh, Shadow, that smells lovely.

What kind is it, anyway? Chocolate? But there's a hint of something else.

...Brimstone?

*pauses and listens as the Beach Boys music reaches a lull between songs*

Uh... does anyone else hear chanting?



~ ...Ph'n...lui m...w'nafh ...thulhu... ~

~ ...R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn... ~

~ IA! IA! CAKETHULHU FHTAGN! ~

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see317
Royalty


Joined: 23 Aug 2006
Posts: 753

PostPosted: Fri Jan 17, 2014 6:10 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote


He just wanted to wish you a happy birthday.
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Shadowstorm
Noble


Joined: 21 Sep 2003
Posts: 145
Location: The place you would least expect.

PostPosted: Fri Jan 17, 2014 9:36 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Actually, that looks more like last year's cake. This one is even worse! And I don't even remember using a baking pan with non-Euclidean dimensions! Who wrote this cookbook, anyway?!

**Takes a look at the cover of the book**

"Baking Beyond the Ages...by N. Hotep."

I'm never getting a book from this guy again. But that doesn't really solve the issue of this eldritch dessert. CST, go!

**The cake suppression team moves in**

"We're in position. Ready for weapons release on your command, sir."

Whoa, whoa! Weapons? But you'll destroy the cake!

"...Isn't that the whole point, sir?"

No! This is Miss Aja's birthday cake. It needs to be decorated....and...uh, subdued.

"I'm pretty sure this cake drains SAN just by looking at it. I dread to think of what would happen if this were ingested..."

It'll be fine! She signed a waiver!

"Oh! Alright then."

**The CST closes in, heavy duty nets and pastry bags of icing in hand**

Well, the cake's almost done. Ooh, pizza!

**Takes a slice of pepperoni**
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see317
Royalty


Joined: 23 Aug 2006
Posts: 753

PostPosted: Fri Jan 17, 2014 10:15 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote


The pizza is also cursed.

[Homer]That's bad[/Homer]
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XiaoCaity
Royalty


Joined: 27 Apr 2009
Posts: 542
Location: Herding magic lizards

PostPosted: Sat Jan 18, 2014 12:03 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Happy belated birthday, Aja!

I'd better go help the Cake Suppression Team, I don't have any SAN left to lose.
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brady kj
Royalty


Joined: 14 Oct 2005
Posts: 544
Location: Big Spoons

PostPosted: Sat Jan 18, 2014 11:47 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'll join the team. I don't know what SAN is, so I probably don't need it.
Sorry I ate Young's cake.
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Shadowstorm
Noble


Joined: 21 Sep 2003
Posts: 145
Location: The place you would least expect.

PostPosted: Sat Jan 18, 2014 12:34 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

SAN = Sanity, a numerical stat that represents one's sound state of mind, and decreases when witnessing scenes of unspeakable horror.

Like, say, a freshly baked cake whose alien geometries distort the fabric of time and space in a 3 foot radius around it, and beckons with the voices of one thousand tormented souls of a nightmarish cult long forgotten.

It's a good thing the CST is immune to SAN drain and all. They're robots.

But sure! You guys are welcome to help. Xiao, here, you can use this lasso to tie it up. Brady...here. Take this toothpick. I'm not sure if the cake is finished baking, so get in there and poke it with this. If the toothpick comes out clean, it's ready. If it eats the toothpick, or, I dunno, turns into a squid-like abomination with a dozen gaping maws, then it might need a few more minutes.
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brady kj
Royalty


Joined: 14 Oct 2005
Posts: 544
Location: Big Spoons

PostPosted: Sun Jan 19, 2014 5:19 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Leaps at cake with toothpick. Tries to stab cake, but drops toothpick. Pokes cake with finger.
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