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Aja Pajamazon
Joined: 21 Jul 2002 Posts: 2084 Location: Thataway
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Posted: Thu Jan 16, 2014 11:33 pm Post subject: |
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Yay, thanks! You guys are the best.
*picks up a martini glass of diet ginger ale, garnished with an olive on a stick*
young wrote: | Alas, Brady ate all the cake. |
Then it must have been a mighty fine cake.
Shadowstorm wrote: | Of course, if you're ok with your cake potentially being a Soviet Russia-style confectionery, I guess I could bake one up. You'll need to sign this waiver, though. |
Well, if you put it that way...
*hastily signs waiver*
...Who could resist?
*passes around some birthday pizza to tide everyone over* _________________ "The one concession a sane man will never yield the universe is that of considering it seriously."
~ James Branch Cabell |
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Shadowstorm Noble
Joined: 21 Sep 2003 Posts: 145 Location: The place you would least expect.
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Posted: Fri Jan 17, 2014 1:10 am Post subject: |
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**Takes the legally binding document and skims it over**
Uh huh....initialed there....signed there, there and there...next of kin filled in....ok! Looks like everything here is in order.
**Stows the legal waiver away carefully**
Now let's bake you that cake!
**Dons a chef's hat and a cooking apron....lined with mythril**
Right, then. Ingredients...check. Oven....check. Cake suppression team....check.
Now, let me just consult the new cookbook...
Step 1: Preheat oven. Simple enough.
Step 2: Mix ingredients thoroughly in large bowl. Ok, not difficult...
**Gathers the flour, sugar, and other such essentials and mixes it all into a fine batter**
Step 3: Pour batter into pan and bake for 20 to 30 minutes. No problem!
**Pours the finished batter into a greased pan and places it in the preheated oven**
There! That wasn't hard at all! Honestly, you guys, with this being as easy as it is, you all could have baked Miss Aja a...wait. 'Recipe continued on next page'...?
Step 4: WARNING!!! During step 2, ingredients MUST be stirred in clockwise direction ONLY!
ACHTUNG!!! Failure to follow these instructions will result in [splatters of blood obscure the rest of the page]
I....but....who would write a recipe like this?! Anyways, I'm....pretty sure I mixed it in the right direction? _________________ "Can it be that those in power are on the verge of repeating a senseless and deadly mistake?"~Final Fantasy VI |
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Aja Pajamazon
Joined: 21 Jul 2002 Posts: 2084 Location: Thataway
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Posted: Fri Jan 17, 2014 11:40 am Post subject: |
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*peers into the kitchen*
Ooh, Shadow, that smells lovely.
What kind is it, anyway? Chocolate? But there's a hint of something else.
...Brimstone?
*pauses and listens as the Beach Boys music reaches a lull between songs*
Uh... does anyone else hear chanting?
~ ...Ph'n...lui m...w'nafh ...thulhu... ~
~ ...R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn... ~
~ IA! IA! CAKETHULHU FHTAGN! ~ _________________ "The one concession a sane man will never yield the universe is that of considering it seriously."
~ James Branch Cabell |
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see317 Royalty
Joined: 23 Aug 2006 Posts: 753
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Posted: Fri Jan 17, 2014 6:10 pm Post subject: |
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He just wanted to wish you a happy birthday. _________________
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Shadowstorm Noble
Joined: 21 Sep 2003 Posts: 145 Location: The place you would least expect.
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Posted: Fri Jan 17, 2014 9:36 pm Post subject: |
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Actually, that looks more like last year's cake. This one is even worse! And I don't even remember using a baking pan with non-Euclidean dimensions! Who wrote this cookbook, anyway?!
**Takes a look at the cover of the book**
"Baking Beyond the Ages...by N. Hotep."
I'm never getting a book from this guy again. But that doesn't really solve the issue of this eldritch dessert. CST, go!
**The cake suppression team moves in**
"We're in position. Ready for weapons release on your command, sir."
Whoa, whoa! Weapons? But you'll destroy the cake!
"...Isn't that the whole point, sir?"
No! This is Miss Aja's birthday cake. It needs to be decorated....and...uh, subdued.
"I'm pretty sure this cake drains SAN just by looking at it. I dread to think of what would happen if this were ingested..."
It'll be fine! She signed a waiver!
"Oh! Alright then."
**The CST closes in, heavy duty nets and pastry bags of icing in hand**
Well, the cake's almost done. Ooh, pizza!
**Takes a slice of pepperoni** _________________ "Can it be that those in power are on the verge of repeating a senseless and deadly mistake?"~Final Fantasy VI |
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see317 Royalty
Joined: 23 Aug 2006 Posts: 753
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Posted: Fri Jan 17, 2014 10:15 pm Post subject: |
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The pizza is also cursed.
[Homer]That's bad[/Homer] _________________
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XiaoCaity Royalty
Joined: 27 Apr 2009 Posts: 542 Location: Herding magic lizards
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Posted: Sat Jan 18, 2014 12:03 am Post subject: |
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Happy belated birthday, Aja!
I'd better go help the Cake Suppression Team, I don't have any SAN left to lose. _________________ Gryphons are better than dragons. Gryphons PURR. |
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brady kj Royalty
Joined: 14 Oct 2005 Posts: 544 Location: Big Spoons
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Posted: Sat Jan 18, 2014 11:47 am Post subject: |
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I'll join the team. I don't know what SAN is, so I probably don't need it.
Sorry I ate Young's cake. _________________ http://alienlife.thecomicseries.com/
brady-kj.deviantart.com |
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Shadowstorm Noble
Joined: 21 Sep 2003 Posts: 145 Location: The place you would least expect.
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Posted: Sat Jan 18, 2014 12:34 pm Post subject: |
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SAN = Sanity, a numerical stat that represents one's sound state of mind, and decreases when witnessing scenes of unspeakable horror.
Like, say, a freshly baked cake whose alien geometries distort the fabric of time and space in a 3 foot radius around it, and beckons with the voices of one thousand tormented souls of a nightmarish cult long forgotten.
It's a good thing the CST is immune to SAN drain and all. They're robots.
But sure! You guys are welcome to help. Xiao, here, you can use this lasso to tie it up. Brady...here. Take this toothpick. I'm not sure if the cake is finished baking, so get in there and poke it with this. If the toothpick comes out clean, it's ready. If it eats the toothpick, or, I dunno, turns into a squid-like abomination with a dozen gaping maws, then it might need a few more minutes. _________________ "Can it be that those in power are on the verge of repeating a senseless and deadly mistake?"~Final Fantasy VI |
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brady kj Royalty
Joined: 14 Oct 2005 Posts: 544 Location: Big Spoons
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Posted: Sun Jan 19, 2014 5:19 pm Post subject: |
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Leaps at cake with toothpick. Tries to stab cake, but drops toothpick. Pokes cake with finger. _________________ http://alienlife.thecomicseries.com/
brady-kj.deviantart.com |
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