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The Story Telling Game!
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Amarath
Noble


Joined: 01 Sep 2009
Posts: 219
Location: Under your bed.

PostPosted: Thu Aug 26, 2010 2:40 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

As Jack rubbed his now slightly bumpy head, he realized that he was in a large control room of sorts. He also noticed a big red button that said in large, glittery words, "DO NOT PUSH!!!" on it. It practically screamed to be pushed.
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Creepy Bob
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Joined: 01 Aug 2009
Posts: 71

PostPosted: Fri Aug 27, 2010 11:07 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

The thing about heroes is that they wouldn't have very much heroic stuff to do if they didn't have a tendency to charge blindly on without thinking first and generally getting in trouble. So, without hesitation, Jack pushed the button.

A deep rumbling followed by a shaking of the ground made the combatants above cease their combat.
"What isss that?!" hissed a Lizard Man.
"An earthquake?" volunteered Missy.
"Oh no... Someone has pushed the Button!" said a Bridge Gnome who had frozen in the middle of trying to bite the Alphonse's remaining ear off.
"Button?" wondered Missy, "what bu-"
Suddenly, with a deafening roar, the Great Tree of !Mzt't began to rise out of the ground on top of a huge jet of flame!
"Our Tree!" screeched the Mad Lizard Men of !Mzt't.
"What madness is this?!" shouted Missy.
"Madness? This is SCIENCE!" replied the Bridge Gnome.

Action Jack watched the silver-barked tree's flight on a monitor in the control room.
"Oh man. Now how am I going to get the logs to the witch?" he groaned.
Out of nowhere a Bridge Gnome in a long white coat dropped onto the control panel in front of him.
"You idiot! First the Guard Tower, now this! Why do you humans have to ruin everything?!"
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Amarath
Noble


Joined: 01 Sep 2009
Posts: 219
Location: Under your bed.

PostPosted: Fri Aug 27, 2010 6:49 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Meanwhile, the metal tree that now slightly resembled a rocket ship shaped like a fish crashed into the second-tallest tree in the forest, cleanly severing it from the roots.
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Creepy Bob
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Joined: 01 Aug 2009
Posts: 71

PostPosted: Sat Aug 28, 2010 2:40 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Even with the Great Forest's largest true tree clinging on to it by its mighty branches, the rocket was unimpeded in its progress and quickly disappeared over the horizon.

Back in her hut in the woods near Missy's farm, the Ichtyomancer was practicing her foul-smelling rituals. However, she was getting frustrated with the absurd things the fish guts were predicting for her immediate future.
"Bah, this chum must be goin' off," she mumbled to herself, and cursed the poor reliability of dead fish nowadays, not at all like in the good old days, and another thing-
A sort of descending tone interrupted her train of thought.
"What in buggery is that noise?" she wondered, and hobbled out of the hut.

A while later the witch was surveying the scene while absent-mindedly putting out small fires in her hair. Her garden, formerly strewn with fish in various stages of decay, was now instead full of huge heaps of charred, splintered timber. And the space once occupied by her hut was now home to what resembled an enormous herring that had buried itself head first into the ground.
It bore the legend "The Alphonse + All the ladies", with a heart around it.
"Thrice-damned fish," the witch said finally, "I'm switchin' tae palm readin'".

"What do you little munchkins need a rocket for?" Action Jack asked the gnome in the white coat...
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Amarath
Noble


Joined: 01 Sep 2009
Posts: 219
Location: Under your bed.

PostPosted: Mon Sep 06, 2010 5:48 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

"You humans don't have any imagination, do you?! We were trying to conquer the sun!"
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Creepy Bob
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Joined: 01 Aug 2009
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PostPosted: Wed Sep 08, 2010 6:41 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

"But isn't the sun, like, on fire and stuff?" said Jack, confused.




(...yes, just that this time. Shock horror, I know.)
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see317
Royalty


Joined: 23 Aug 2006
Posts: 753

PostPosted: Wed Sep 08, 2010 8:46 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

"You idiot... What, do you think we're complete and total morons?
We're going to conquer the sun at night."

Jack held up a finger, fully prepared to point out the multitude of flaws that would certainly derail this train of logic, when the diminutive being continued speaking over his half-voiced objections.

"Problem is you see," the gnome whispered in a conspiritorial tone of voice, "we don't think we'll be able to find the sun at night, seeing as how it's dark at the time... You see, the gnomish people were blessed with a great variety of impressive physical gifts... heh, they don't call us 'nature's tripods' for nothing you know, but unfortunately good night vision was not high on our creator's list of priorities."
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Creepy Bob
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PostPosted: Fri Sep 10, 2010 11:17 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

"That's why we're in this mess in the first place. Westphalian loggers have plagued this forest for generations, felling ancient trees to build furniture for that damnable Cerumen Palace of the ruling von Midget family (they may be of almost the proper size unlike the rest of you giants, but we still find them very disagreeable). No matter how many tollbooths and guard towers we set up, the loggers are always able to sneak into the forest by cover of night from somewhere. And each and every time they come here, one of the trees they cut down somehow always happens to be the Great Tree of the Mad Lizard Men of !Mzt't. There's no living with those guys when they're in the midst of religious outrage."
Jack kept quiet and nodded encouragingly, hoping that the gnome scientist's rant would make sense at some point.
"So we started building this rocket," the gnome continued, "to mine that bright sunlight for use in our lanterns. Easier to put a bolt between a lumberjack's eyes that way."
Jack stared at the gnome. He opened his mouth to speak and shut it again. He made another attempt, but no ...nothing.
He'd always relied on other, smarter people to do the thinking for him, and hearing what was obviously a very advanced race of people hatch ideas that even he could see the flaws of was stupefying.
"Forty years this project has taken us," the gnome sighed, looking at the monitor. "In that time the Mad Lizard Men happened to choose our disguised rocket as their Great Tree, but we figured it'd be harder to cut down than their Great Tree usually is, spare us both some hassle for a while." He looked back up at Jack. "And then you had to come along and launch it without crew or destination. Back to square bloody one, and I bet the Mad Lizard Men of !Mzt't have become upset again, too."
Jack kept staring at the gnome for a few more moments, then cleared his throat. "Well, I've got some good news and some bad news for ya. Good news, the Midget Lord will no longer be a problem. Bad news, you won't like his replacement..."

The battle above had calmed down considerably. Most of the Lizard Men had sunk to the ground in shock, howling prayers at the sky, and the Alphonse had settled down to exchange tree-bark recipes with the Bridge Gnomes.
Only the leader of the group of Lizard Men was still trying to fight Missy, but it was obvious his heart wasn't in it.
"Thisss isss ridiculousss" it hissed, sagging. "Trusssce?"
Missy eyed the Lizard Man carefully to appraise if it could be trusted to keep the promise of cease-stab, then put down her weapon. The Lizard Man did the same. It gave the spot where the rocket/Great Tree of !Mzt't had been a forlorn look.
"My father usssed to tell me the Great Tree usssed to go missssing all the time back in the old daysss. But I never imagined it would be like thisss," it said. Missy thought she could see tears welling up in its otherwise emotionless, slit-pupilled eyes.

"The Devil?!" the gnome scientist exclaimed. "No lover of nature is he..."
"That's right. If he manages to gain full control of the mortal realm (or the part of it that is Westphalia, anyway) he'll ravage the Great Forest worse than the von Midget family ever did. That's why I've got a proposition for you..."

(woo, another long one. It keeps happening.)
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Amarath
Noble


Joined: 01 Sep 2009
Posts: 219
Location: Under your bed.

PostPosted: Sun Sep 12, 2010 11:30 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

End chapter three?
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Creepy Bob
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Posts: 71

PostPosted: Mon Sep 13, 2010 8:28 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Well, we've gotten the logs to the witch, and there's nothing too unresolved far as I can see, so it's a good enough place to stop, I guess. Anyone have any objections?

So, show of hands: the queen's blood or the devil's hair in the next chapter? I'd go for the queen, Hell being, well, Hell, and would so be more suited for the conclusion of this quest.
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