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Happy Birthday Aja!
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Devilin Richer
Noble


Joined: 18 Sep 2011
Posts: 153
Location: Around the corner.

PostPosted: Mon Jan 20, 2014 1:20 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

A belated Happy birthday to you, hun. Many more to you as well.
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young
Royalty


Joined: 25 Aug 2009
Posts: 375

PostPosted: Mon Jan 20, 2014 2:27 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Is... Is that cake moving on its own?


*slowly backs away from the room to not make any real sudden movements.*
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Shadowstorm
Noble


Joined: 21 Sep 2003
Posts: 145
Location: The place you would least expect.

PostPosted: Fri Jan 24, 2014 12:16 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Bah! I guess it's true what they say about too many cooks...that one of the cooks will inevitably slip up and be devoured utterly by mind-shattering horrors too gruesome to contemplate.

I'm pretty sure that's what they say, anyway.

At any rate, I guess if you want something done right...

**Charges into the fray wielding a rolling pin**

Back, foul (but hopefully delicious) pastry! Back into the darkness that spawned you! For another 10 minutes until you finish baking!

**Shadow, with the aid of the CST, drives Cakethulu back into the depths....of the oven, which is promptly secured with a padlock**
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"Can it be that those in power are on the verge of repeating a senseless and deadly mistake?"~Final Fantasy VI
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brady kj
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Joined: 14 Oct 2005
Posts: 544
Location: Big Spoons

PostPosted: Fri Jan 24, 2014 9:33 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

This can only be the work of... The Breadmaster!

Guess what I'm referencing?
It's The Tick.
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Shadowstorm
Noble


Joined: 21 Sep 2003
Posts: 145
Location: The place you would least expect.

PostPosted: Wed Jan 29, 2014 1:53 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

**The ominous ring of a bell reverberates throughout the room**

Huh. Well, I don't remember the kitchen timer sounding like THAT, but I think the cake is done baking! CST, take your positions.

**The CST...now reduced to a single member, approaches the oven cautiously**

Wait. What happened to everyone else?

They're undergoing decontamination for cake batter exposure, sir. It's nothing serious, but they'll be in diagnostics for the next few hours.

Ok then....looks like it's just us. Open the oven.

Yes, sir.

**The CST member opens the oven to reveal...a seemingly innocuous chocolate cake in a round pan**

Target shows zero activity. Shall I take it out of the oven?

No, wait. We need to be sure about this.

**Prods the cake with a long stick**

**Sure enough, the very air around the begins to twist and warp out of focus**

Spatial distortion is now at a 6 inch radius. Well, that's better than 3 feet...

I think that's as good as its going to get. You can take out the cake now. Just take out the entire oven rack and put it over there. I'll handle the rest.

Yes, sir.

**The CST member accomplishes its task, but remains close at hand, eyeing the cake warily**

Ok Aja, your cake will be done very soon now! Just as soon as it quits eating the frosting. Or sending it to be consumed by its dark overlords, whichever.
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"Can it be that those in power are on the verge of repeating a senseless and deadly mistake?"~Final Fantasy VI
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Aja
Pajamazon


Joined: 21 Jul 2002
Posts: 2081
Location: Thataway

PostPosted: Sat Feb 01, 2014 11:24 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

*waits for the sounds of screams, general mayhem, and the rending of the fabric of reality to quiet down*

*slowly emerges from behind the kitchen counter*

*warily appraises the cake from a safe distance*

*notes the fluffy texture, the enticing chocolate aroma, and the way the frosting seems to form a different motif of squamous coils and non-Euclidian angles every time she looks away*

Shocked

I, uh...

Gosh, Shadow, I don't know what to say.

Except...

Best.
Cake.
Ever.

Less Than Three
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"The one concession a sane man will never yield the universe is that of considering it seriously."
~ James Branch Cabell
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errantskies
Serf


Joined: 05 Dec 2012
Posts: 7

PostPosted: Sun Feb 02, 2014 7:54 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I have never laughed so hard at a birthday tribute in my life, Shadow. You win at all birthdays, forever. +100 Internets.

Aja: I don’t have money to donate although I sorely wish I could (the problem is that I do not have my own income, and my mother decides how our money is spent). One day I will commission you, as it is one of my dearest dreams to receive a piece of your beautiful artwork.

But in the meantime, I did my best to help you by recommending True Magic to whoever I could, including in a fanmail to Danielle Corsetto (of Girls With Slingshots). I wanted to write to her anyway, but I felt like she would really enjoy TM, and if she decided to pimp it on her site you would probably have a huge influx of readers, so... I figured I would give it a go. Worth the risk, right?

Anyway, happy birthday and thank you so much for True Magic and good luck with making rent, etc. etc. etc.

(Sorry if this comes across a little brusque, I am quite tired today and it’s hard to word things the way I want. Plus there is so much to say.)
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Shadowstorm
Noble


Joined: 21 Sep 2003
Posts: 145
Location: The place you would least expect.

PostPosted: Sun Feb 02, 2014 8:28 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Well, I'm glad that's all taken care of. It may take a a couple of purification rituals to fully cleanse the out-of-commission CST members, and I'm pretty sure we've brought the world a couple of years closer to the end of days, but, I'm really glad you liked your cake, Miss Aja.

Funny story. After all was said and done, the cake actually sung you a birthday song! I had #76 record it for you. Play it back for her, will you?

Yes, sir.

Music hApPy BiRtHdAy To YoU
hApPy BiRtHdAy To Y-eArRrrRgGgHhh!
Music


Well, uh, it sung you part of a birthday song, but we kinda interrupted it when we started cutting the cake, sorry. The rest was just lots of cursing and ominous threats. You probably don't want to hear any of that.
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"Can it be that those in power are on the verge of repeating a senseless and deadly mistake?"~Final Fantasy VI
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Aja
Pajamazon


Joined: 21 Jul 2002
Posts: 2081
Location: Thataway

PostPosted: Tue Feb 04, 2014 4:57 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thank you for your good wishes, errantskies! I really appreciate your wanting to help, and it's awesome that you've taken the time to recommend TM. ♥

On the subject of artwork: I'm still hoping to offer a free sketch giveaway in a few months. (I usually do that in January, but it had to be postponed this time.) Maybe you can catch it later this year. Grin

Shadowstorm wrote:
Funny story. After all was said and done, the cake actually sung you a birthday song!

Shocked

Y'know, it actually has a pretty good voice for a cake.

Sounds a bit like Tim Curry.
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"The one concession a sane man will never yield the universe is that of considering it seriously."
~ James Branch Cabell
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Shadowstorm
Noble


Joined: 21 Sep 2003
Posts: 145
Location: The place you would least expect.

PostPosted: Fri Jan 16, 2015 3:03 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Happy Birthday Aja! I hope this day finds you well. And I hope you have an healthy appetite, because this year I'm baking you the best birthday cake ever! ...I mean, third time's the charm, right? ...Right?

Well, anyways, on to baking!

**Grabs a large spoon and puts on an apron**

"Hold it!"

**A middle-aged man dressed in suit and tie, carrying a briefcase, rushes into the topic**

"Sir, I need you to put down that spoon and step away from the oven."

H...hey! What gives?

"As a duly designated representative of...a multitude of governing bodies, I have been instructed to serve you with this legal document. I ask that you read it immediately."

**The official hands over a sealed manila envelope**

Ok....*unseals the envelope* let's see here..."it is our duty to inform you that...blah blah blah...as a result of the incident that occurred one January 17th, 2014, henceforth referred to "Cake-ageddon"...yada yada yada...cease and desist any and all baking operations forthwith...in perpetuity or until such time that....

*continues reading*

...demonstrated criminal and malicious culinary abilities...

...scientific analysis confirms the presence of strangelets on and in the vicinity of the cake pan used...

** gets angrier and angrier as the Cease and Desist document continues**

...as defined in Title 18 Chapter 10 of the United States Code.... Neutral...condemned by recently passed UN Security Council and General Assembly resolutions....Quite Ticked....An affront to the laws of both MAN and GOD?! Why you..!!Rant Rant Rant

**Quickly regains his composure and turns to Aja**

...Ahem. Um. Well, until such time as I can obtain legal representation, I don't think I'll be allowed to bake that cake for you.

**Moves to the legally mandated minimum distance of 100 yards away from the kitchen**

In the meantime, plan B. I managed to find another singing goat!

Goat Music
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"Can it be that those in power are on the verge of repeating a senseless and deadly mistake?"~Final Fantasy VI
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